So, we haven been staying with our family since everything has happen,and we have decided that returning home is just not going to happen..My world (or the remains of my world) are patiently awaiting their move into morgys 'new room'. We've decided that we want to set her room back up just like we had it. wish we could leave it all untouched..but just don't think that's an option.so the next best is to leave in untouched and set up in our new house. People may or may not think I am crazy but I've realised that 'people' are not the ones that are having to go through what we are and however we decide to cope is simply our choice and how we will do it. I don't think there is a 'right' or 'wrong' way, but honestly whatever makes us come to be a little more at peace is what we will do. I am ready to sit in my rocker in her pink room and read her books as if she was laying there trying to chew on the book as we read..I'm ready to fold her clothes, and arrange her room just so its perfect for her. No matter how many times you hear 'she's ok'...as a mother you want to make sure. I am trying to hard not to question things, but I catch myself jealous, mad, frustrated, and most of all heartbroken on the way my angel went. why so tragically..?? Ill never understand that, but I don't think I am meant to. I can honestly say for the first time in my life that I have no plan. I have no desire for a plan. The only think I get excited about is the lord taking me home to be with my sugarbooger. when we go on sundays and visit 'her spot' It makes me yearn to have a spot next to the left of her, and jeff to the right...honestly, it wouldn't matter where my body ended up as long as my spirit was in that heavenly place playing with my angel.
Tiff, everyone will grieve and get through in their own way--you will find your own path. Just remember that you do not have to do it by yourself! I feel God will give you your plan, and He'll give it to you when He knows you are ready. Just always look and listen for Him. I am praying for wherever your new home will be, and that when that time comes, God will bring you peace and joy. Still praying!! Love you much!
ReplyDeleteTiff, I agree with everything Susan said. You guys will get through in your own way and your own time. Just know that God is right there with you and He will never leave you. I know you miss her...but remember she is right there with you...I know you can feel her spirit...keep talking to her. She will wait for you forever and a day.
ReplyDeleteI am sure you have received tons of advice from people...some good...some not so good....listen to God, He will guide you, He will send you people to help you, He already has. No matter what you do or where you will go....(would still love to have you out here at Loving!!) just know that you are loved and prayed for continuously.
A new home is a great thing...new beginnings...keep smiling...Morgan is watching you. We love you lots....Carla
I read your blog everyday now, and pray for you each night! I hope some kind of comfort & peace finds you tonight... you know you will see Morgan in your dreams. And the lady above is right, always keep talking to her. She will always be right by your side, listening & loving you.
ReplyDeleteAnd, do WHATEVER helps you heal & feel better. Because you said it perfectly, "people" have no idea what you're going through.
-Victoria