I believe

I've noticed I've gotten off track I wanted to start from the beginning and work my way up to the 'end' even though I realize that this is not the end, just the beginning. I think back, and I can find so many reasons to praise god. number one, he blessed me with a beautiful healthy child, one with no extra needs, or health conditions. so many people have children that have to deal with those things on a daily basis and I just praise God we didn't have to go through that. God knows what we can handle, yes I've been dealt a pretty large hand in my 22 years, but that is something I don't think I could have handled. I also got to experience several of 'the firsts', which is what I will get to hold on to forever. Her first time to hold her head up, first time to roll tummy to back and back to tummy. The first time she rode in her stroller like a big girl. Our first shopping trips. The first time she said 'da da'. even when she said 'ma ma'. Her first 2 teeth! Thanksgiving, Christmas. The list goes on and on... so many mommies miss out on those things, so he has reminded me of these things to be thankful for. My morgan will live with me forever. It seemed like yesterday was a easier day. almost scared to say that out loud, but it was. maybe because I spent the morning with my 'nanny' which has to be one of the most inspiring and uplifting people I know. I've always looked up to her because of her optimisim and her strong walk with the lord. It was like she didn't even give a second to get down on myself. I know between that and the prayers, it allowed me to have a good (yes I said good) day! Satan tries to steal my happiness and says..'You had a good day? How could a mother that just lost her baby TRAGiCALLY have a GOOD day?" Its because of Gods amazing love, and my friends that love and pray for me continuously. I'm sure there are people out there that voice their opinion about me especially the ones that are 'lost' in this world, and I'm sure they could blab off something stupid like I could have prevented this...I now really see this was God's plan. There are no accidents in the sight of the Lord. I pray I never run across a person that thinks differently... I also wanted to thank everyone for the encouragement, and for those keeping up with my blog. Also, to the ones that check on me daily and pray for us daily...by the grace of god and all of you guys will be the only way I can continue on with this life I need to live. I thank you for that.                      .