If only it weren't a dream

Tuesday ninght i came home exhausted from work and I told jeff right after we ate that I thought I was going to go ahead and go to sleep. Even though it was still light out..I got ready for bed and crashed. I usually take my medicine everynight before going to bed, however, for some reason that night I was just focus on going straight to sleep and forgot to take it. I've never forgotten to take it since everything has happend. I dreamed all night long. I had a dream that night that Morgan came back. How she got here I don't know, but I know I had her in my arms, and I was going everywhere to show her off and show everyone that she was ok, and that God healed her, and that shes back now with us. IT WAS ALL SO SO SO REAL. I remember in the dream we were at my Nannys and now that we are just the next road over from her I told Jeff to stay right there with and hold her becuse I had to run home and get her diaper bag, (which is in her closet).  I grabbed the bag, filled it with new diapers, wipes, and clothes...all of which are perfectly put in her dresser right now in her room. Once it was all filled I hurried back to Nanny's and there she was all smiles and even standing!! We were all so excited because she was standing, and smiling, and even talking some. She kept saying mommy, and 'wuv you', it was perfect!! I snatched her up and laid her down so I could change her diaper and put on a new outfit. I soon realized that the outfits which I have from when she went to heaven were 6-9 month clothes, and she would now be 13 months on this earth she was too long and I couldn't snap the buttons on her outfit so I told jeff that we were going to have to go shopping. The next thing I remember is that I wanted to take her swimming. I think this part came from the other day I was wondering around the baby section at the store the other day and it hit me that we never got to swim together..she would have loved that. All the swimsuits, and the little swimmer diapers...Thats one thing we never got to put her in. Anways, in the dream we had it all and I remember saying she finally gets to wear her swimsuit. She got to swim with her friend Roxy, and it was perfect. I know God gave me this dream to show me that she is fine, and give me comfort by showing me that shes ok in heaven, but if she were here on earth still, this is what she would look like and be doing. This is the pain that has been making my heart hurt the most lately. Seeing everyone else getting to cotinue on with their lives, as my life is on pause. Its tough. All of these childeren that are younger than morgan are sitting, and standing..and even talking a little. Which means Morgan would more than likely be above and beyond some of those accomplishments. That hole in my heart that I will live with until I'm reunited with her in heaven, was filled in that dream..I felt it the next mornging going from filled to broke again in moments. As you can imagine I did NOT want to get up that day. I wanted to close my eyes and continuing dreaming for the rest of my life. Even though the things we did in that dream were simple little things, they meant the world to me. Thank you Lord for being such an compasionate God, and giving me this dream knowing how much it would comfort my heart. Mommy Loves you Morgan Rilee!